The Devil Tots Make a More Realistic Voodoo Doll Than Any of Angelique's!

Carolyn Gets a Closeup!
"I said furrow your brow, Nancy!"
"I am furrowing it!"
"It's no good, her skin is too perfect. Maybe we can do a closeup of Grayson instead."

Carolyn Sings Pansy's Theme!
"Carolyn, do me a favour. If you ever find yourself a crazy old lady in the ruins of Collinwood, and write me a list of clues about what happened, DON'T write "The Night I Sang My Song." Instead write "The Night I Sang THAT Song." I'll know what it means."

Today on Dark Shadows...

Carolyn Acquires Psychic Powers!
"Is there any chance you might show us this Second Sight of yours?"
"As long as you promise not to call me Four Eyes."

Liz Keeps Poo-Pooing the Clues!
"I wish you two would forget about those ridiculous clues from 1995, and put your trust in something serious... like Horoscopes."
"Elizabeth, your own horoscope says For Entertainment Only on the back, just like in the newspapers!"
"Sebastian only put that there to keep the fuzz off his back!"

Carolyn Tries a 7-11 Burrito!

Episode 1095

Starring Kathy Cody, Joan Bennett, Nancy Barrett, Grayson Hall, David Henesy, Jonathan Frid
Original Script By Sam Hall
Directed By Henry Kaplan
Caption Version by Graeme Cree

Read left to right, top to bottom

"My name is Bob Lloyd. Yesterday on Dark Shadows, Carolyn sang Pansy Faye's Theme Song. Any catastrophe that comes after this is anti-climatic."

"(Bob Lloyd) Meanwhile, at an abandoned mansion on the outskirts of..."
"(Dan Curtis) I keep telling you, that's a dollhouse! A dollhouse!"


(In the Drawing Room)
"(Carolyn) I can start now, Mother."
"(Liz) Start what?"
"(Carolyn) My concert, of course."
"(Liz) Of course..."
"(Carolyn) Ahem. For my first number, I should like to sing my very favorite song."
"(Liz) Which one is that? You mean The I've Got Those Mother Won't Buy Me a New Car, Give Back My Charger Plates, Or Open a Credit Account For Me At Brewster's Department Store Blues?"

"(Carolyn) Of course not. Dr. Demento made that one seem ridiculous somehow. I mean..."
(Carolyn bursts forth into song)
"(Carolyn) o/I want to dance with youuuuuuu! Want to dance my cares awayyyyyy! I'll be so close to youuuuuuu, in your arms I'll always stayyyyyy... *"
* Bob Cobert made good on his promise to re-write the lyrics overnight.

(Julia appears on the Foyer landing)
"(Carolyn) Our hearts will beat in tuuuuuune, to the rhythm of our LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOVE!!!"
"(Julia) Is somebody doing Moose calls down there??"

(Julia realizes that Clue #4 is in progress, and rushes to stop it)
"(Carolyn) It's always been said that life is a song, so why don't we both just dance along?"
"(Julia) Carolyn, stop!!!"
"(Carolyn) Around and around, together we two, cause I wanna dance with youuuu!"
"(Julia) Stop!! No more! No more!!"
"(Carolyn) Encore!?"
"(Julia) Nooooooo!!!!"

"(Carolyn) You must be quiet! How can I sing my song with all this screaming going on? But as I have been asked for an encore: o/I want to dance with yoooooou, want to dance your cares awayyyyyyy...."
"(Julia) Too late! I'm too late! The children! The children! I've got to go check on the children!"
(Julia rushes out)
"(Liz) Coward!"


"(Carolyn) I'll be so... close... to..."
(As she grabs her head, Carolyn herself is close to unconsciousness...)
"(Dan Curtis) You know, it's just struck me that this might be the best of all possible times for those zombies to attack the house."

( she pirouettes to the floor in what is later rated as one of Dark Shadows' Top 5 Miniskirt Faints...)

(Liz rushes up in concern to check on Carolyn, at the same time, subtly slipping a blackjack up her sleeve)
"(Liz) Well, she asked for it!"

"(Bob Lloyd) One more time!"
"(Dan Curtis) Kill him! Kill him!!"


(Liz runs out after Julia)
"(Liz) Julia! Come back, quickly! It's Carolyn!"
"(Julia) What's happened?"
"(Liz) I don't know, she just clutched her head and fell to the ground!"
"(Julia) That's funny, you wouldn't think it would have had that effect on her!"

(In the Drawing Room, while Liz was out snagging Julia, Stagehands have helpfully moved Carolyn's body to the sofa)

(Julia rushes in and takes Carolyn's pulse)
"(Julia) Gasp! She's... she's dead!"
"(Liz) Julia, that's your own pulse you're taking!"

(Carolyn stirs)
"(Carolyn) Who hoppen!?"
"(Liz) You miniskirt-fainted, dear. That's all."
"(Carolyn) Did I finish my song?"
"(Liz) What difference does that make?"
"(Julia) Just lie there until you feel better."
"(Carolyn) If I didn't finish my song, I'm going to have to sing it over again!"
"(Julia and Liz) You finished it! You finished it!"


"(Liz) Believe me, you finished it."
"(Julia) BOY, did you finish it!"
(Outside, David and Hallie are eavesdropping)
"(Carolyn) You didn't like my song, Julia! Why not?"
"(Julia) Well, apart from the obvious reasons, it was one of the Clues and I missed it!"
"(Carolyn) You were very rude, and interrupted me. I shant forget that, Julia."
"(Julia) Oh yeah? Well, I shant forget... that you didn't invite me to your concert!"
"(Liz) You wanted to come?"
"(Julia) Not really, I'm just looking for a snappy comeback here."
"(Carolyn) Those "Clues" are ridiculous, Julia."
"(Julia) Even though every one of them has come true so far?"
"(Carolyn) They've all come true, and nothing has come of any of them."
"(Julia) Nothing that we know of! Why are you suddenly against us?"
"(Liz) She's not herself, Julia."
"(Julia) Ah, but who is she?"
"(Liz) Well, I don't know, but I have three Blues Clues to that written down here in my Handy Dandy Notebook, if you'd like to try to help me solve them."
"(Julia) Oh, that's ridiculous, Elizabeth!"
"(Liz) (grossly offended) What, my clues are ridiculous and yours aren't???"


"(Liz) Why don't we let her rest? You won't find out any more tonight."
"(Julia) We've got to find out now! The house may not be here tomorrow!"
"(Carolyn) Oh yes. "Gerard" is going to destroy us."
"(Julia) Don't make light of it, Carolyn. He is making you act this way."
"(Carolyn) What kind of a name for a Destroyer is that? "Gerard"?"
"(Julia) I'd better go check on the children."
"(Carolyn) Cyril the Conquerer! Percy the Unspeakable! Cecil, Who makes Strong Men Weep!"

(In David's Room)
"(Hallie) It's all beginning, David! Just like I knew it would! Now Carolyn has turned into Leticia!"
"(David) What makes you think she's Leticia?"
"(Hallie) She's not acting like herself at all. Who else could she be?"
"(David) We're not acting like ourselves. Are we Leticia too?"
"(Hallie) I don't know. I've just got one question about it all."
"(David) What's that?"
"(Hallie) Who's Leticia?"

(knock, knock, knock)
"(David) If we're up to anything, stop now! Come in!!"
(Julia enters)
"(Julia) Well, how are you kids doing?"
"(David) Terrible. "(Julia) Why?? What's happened??"
"(David) Schoolwork."
"(Julia) Oh!"
"(David) Why do we have to work in the summer, anyway? Can't they wait until we start regular classes in the fall?"
"(Julia) You may not be alive then... Er, I mean you're behind in your work as it is!"


"(Hallie) I'm not very good at History, so David has been helping me."
"(Julia) Er, tell me. Did you happen to hear Carolyn singing downstairs just now?"
"(Hallie) Singing? No."
"(David) Caterwauling, yes."

"(Hallie) Oh, was that Carolyn down there? I thought somebody was strangling a cat. What page are we on?"
"(David) 86. I'll quiz you."
"(Julia) Well, as long as you kids are okay, I'll be on my way."
"(Hallie) We're fine, thanks. Just trying to get some work done."
"(David) What year did The War of 1812 start?"
"(Hallie) 1492."

(Julia rushes to Monticello The Old House)

"(Julia) Barnabas! Barnabas, it's come true!"
"(Barnabas) The house is destroyed!??"
"(Julia) Well no, not that bad. But the 4th Clue has happened!"
"(Barnabas) The 4th Clue!?"
"(Julia) Only it's worse than we thought! Carolyn didn't sing HER song! She sang Pansy's!!"

"(Barnabas) What are you talking about? She sang Pansy's? I've heard of Everything's Coming Up Roses, but this is ridiculous."
"(Julia) Well, the 4th Clue was "The Night I Sang My Song", and tonight she did!"
"(Barnabas) Yes, I gathered that much. When did it happen?"
"(Julia) Just now. I came downstairs and found her singing in the Drawing Room."
"(Barnabas) Was there any evidence of spirits in the room as she sang?"
"(Julia) Well no, but if that wasn't enough to wake the dead, I don't know what would be."


"(Barnabas) And you say she sang Everything's Coming Up Pansies?"
"(Julia) No, she sang Pansy Faye's song!"
"(Barnabas) Who?"
"(Julia) You remember!"
"(Barnabas) I'm afraid I don't."
"(Julia) Suppressed memory. That can happen in the case of a trauma."

"(Julia) I mean that showgirl from 1897. The one who possessed Charity Trask, and kept singing that Cockney ditty of hers."
"(Barnabas) Well, I remember Charity Trask..."
"(Julia) And Carolyn seems possessed too."
"(Barnabas) By who?"
"(Julia) I didn't want to do this, but you're forcing me."
(Julia dons a conveniently placed feather boa from the hat rack and begins swiveling her hips as she sings)
"(Julia) (singing) o/I wanna dance wif youuuuuu, wanna dance your cares awayyyyy/o...."
"(Barnabas) (remembering) I... want to dance with you?"
"(Julia) No, I wanna dance wif you. Get it right."

"(Julia) o/I'll do the hoochie-cooooo, and the ta-ra-boom-de-ayyyyyy/o"
"(Barnabas) All right, stop! Stop!"
"(Julia) You remember now?"
"(Barnabas) I remember! But Pansy Faye couldn't have been alive in 1840!"
"(Julia) With a song like that, I'm surprised she was even alive in 1897."

"(Barnabas) Now we're getting somewhere. Gerard has just made his one fatal mistake."
"(Julia) It wasn't fatal, but very nearly."
"(Barnabas) No, don't you see? He's possessed Carolyn by someone from 1897, but he doesn't realize that I lived in 1897 and knew Pansy Faye!... Heck, I even buried her."
"(Julia) How is that supposed to help fight Gerard?"
"(Barnabas) Well, I'm not sure, but perhaps I'll think of it on the way over."

(At Collinwood)
"(Carolyn) I know you don't understand the way I've been acting, mother..."
"(Liz) Even worse, I'm afraid I do. The strain..."
"(Carolyn) Oh, this isn't about Jeb any more."
"(Liz) Well, you're either losing your mind, or you're possessed."
"(Carolyn) I wouldn't call it possessed, exactly... It's more like a time share deal."

"(Liz) Carolyn, where did you hear that song?"
"(Carolyn) What song?"
"(Liz) Well, perhaps it shouldn't be called a song, exactly, but whatever it was that you sang. It sounded so strange."
"(Carolyn) That's because it's from the Victorian Era, mother."
"(Liz) Victorian Era? You mean when Miss Winters was with us?"
"(Carolyn) No, no, not Vicki Winters, the other one. You know. "Ve are not amused"!"

(Barnabas and Julia enter)
"(Barnabas) Good evening, Elizabeth."
"(Liz) Good evening, Barnabas."
"(Barnabas) Good Evening, Carolyn."
"(Carolyn) Good evening, Julia."
"(Julia) Good evening, Carolyn. Good evening, Elizabeth."
"(Barnabas) Good evening, Carolyn. Good evening, Julia."
"(Liz) Good evening, Carolyn... Look, will you knock it off???"

"(Carolyn) So Julia ran crying to you, and you came to question me, Barnabas."
"(Barnabas) She didn't run crying, she ran singing! And only because another Clue came true!"
"(Carolyn) You two are probably going to freak out when the house is destroyed, too. You've got to overplay everything."

"(Barnabas) I thought you took our situation seriously, Carolyn."
"(Carolyn) I thought so too."
"(Liz) Barnabas, please. Carolyn's been questioned quite enough by Julia."
"(Carolyn) It's all right, Mother. Go check David and Hallie. So Barnabas can know once and for all that his fears are groundless."
"(Liz) Very well. When this night is through and nothing has happened, I hope you both will forget this ridiculous fantasy of the house being destroyed his year."
(Liz leaves)
"(Julia) We'll forget on January 1st, and not before!"
"(Barnabas) Good comeback, Julia."

"(Carolyn) All right, I suppose the first thing you want to know is when I met Gerard."
"(Barnabas) No, the first thing I want to know is about the song you sang."
"(Carolyn) Oh! You mean.... o/I wanna dance/o..."
"(Barnabas) I don't want to hear it, I want to hear about it!"
"(Carolyn) Spoilsport!"


"(Barnabas) Where did you find that song?"
"(Carolyn) In a songbook in the attic. Right next to a song called That's What I Like About the South, and Fish Heads, Fish Heads, Roly-Poly Fish Heads."
"(Barnabas) Let me see that book! Hmmm..."
"(Julia) (reading) Songs to Empty a Room By??"

"(Barnabas) You've never been interested in music, Carolyn... Or in emptying rooms."
"(Carolyn) I know, but I found this song and liked it."
"(Julia) Enough to arrange an impromptu concert?"
"(Carolyn) I overheard you reading from Quentin's diary that there had been a concert in this room in 1840, so I thought I'd commemorate it."
"(Julia) That concert was for Harmonica and Armpit!"
"(Carolyn) I was working up to that."
"(Julia) Never mind!"

"(Barnabas) Carolyn. Have you ever heard of someone named Pansy Faye?"
"(Carolyn) A porn star?"
"(Barnabas) No... At least I mean I don't think so. I didn't know her that well. And you really found that song in the attic?"
"(Carolyn) Yes. Why?"
"(Barnabas) Strange. I could have sworn I'd burned every surviving copy."

"(Barnabas) And you're sure you haven't heard of Pansy Faye?"
"(Carolyn) Crikey, why no, I ain't, luv!"
"(Barnabas) Ah ha! If you haven't heard of her, how did you know she was a Cockney?"
"(Carolyn) You must not have read the 10th verse to her song."
"(Barnabas) What's that got to do with it?"
"(Carolyn) When it talked about "scoffing some bangers down the pub wif me mum in old Blighty", I sort of got the hint."



"(Barnabas) When did you first get second sight?"
"(Carolyn) Who knows? Maybe I've always had it and didn't know."
"(Julia) Well, when did you first realize you had it?"
"(Carolyn) A day or so ago."
"(Barnabas) Could you demonstrate it for us, or is it a secret?"
"(Carolyn) It's not secret, but I don't feel the need to prove myselves to you two."
"(Julia) Chicken!..."
"(Barnabas) Buck-buck-bacaw!..."
"(Carolyn) All right, knock it off!"

"(Carolyn) I'll show you two!"
(Carolyn stares meditatively, and conjures up a vision of the Carousel, which she can see, but which Barnabas and Julia can't)
"(Julia) Is she showing you?"
"(Barnabas) She's not showing me, I thought she was showing you!"

(Carolyn's vision is in color and wide frame, so her psychic camera man pans over the room, spotting Rose Cottage in the process)
"(Carolyn) I see... a Carousel."
"(Julia) Barnabas, that's the same carousel we saw!"
"(Barnabas) How do you know that??"
"(Carolyn) Now I'm seeing toys. Lots of toys."
"(Julia) Is it a Playroom!? Could what you're seeing be described as a Playroom??"
"(Barnabas) Stop leading the witness, Julia!"
"(Julia) Well, what do you think she's seeing?? Santa's Workshop??"

"(Barnabas) Go on, Carolyn! Go on!"
"(Julia) Don't stop now!"
(Carolyn puts her hand to her head)
"(Julia) What's wrong??"
"(Barnabas) Has the vision faded??"
"(Carolyn) No, all this shouting is giving me a headache."

"(Barnabas) Carolyn, what happened in the Playroom!?"
"(Carolyn) What Playroom?"
"(Barnabas) The one that Julia and I saw in 1998!"
"(Julia) 1995."
"(Barnabas) Whatever! The one that doesn't exist in this time!"
"(Carolyn) Wait a minute! I'm seeing another vision!"
"(Barnabas) Of the Playroom?"
"(Carolyn) No, of Pansy Faye's grave! If you'll give me a minute, I might be able to see her buried her there."
"(Barnabas) (hastily) Well, we've no time to waste on that! Let's go, Julia!"


"(Julia) Where are we going? Pansy's Grave?"
"(Barnabas) No, we must take David and Hallie out of this house tonight!"
"(Julia) To Pansy's grave?"
"(Barnabas) No, to Stokes' house! Will you forget about Pansy Faye??"

(Up in David's Room)
"(David) Well, that's it. That's the best I can do at making a Barnabas doll."
"(Hallie) Well, I don't know what Gerard will think about it, but Fisher Price has already offered to buy the rights."


"(Hallie) Now tell me again why we need a Barnabas doll."
"(David) The dolls allow people to live in Rose Cottage, right?"
"(Hallie) Right."
"(David) So, if we put the Barnabas doll into Rose Cottage, maybe it will let Barnabas find the Playroom the next time he opens the Linen Closet."
"(Hallie) But what if he doesn't open the Linen Closet for a long time?"
"(David) Oh, I've taken care of that. I propped a bucket of water over the front door."

"(Hallie) Even if the theory is right, do you think this doll would help Barnabas find the Playroom? I mean it doesn't even look like him, really."
"(David) Yeah, it does. It's got the cape and the spiky hair. That's close enough."
"(Hallie) I guess you're right. The Leticia Doll didn't really look much like Carolyn, either."
"(David) Actually, it did. You've just never seen her first thing in the morning."

"(Hallie) But even if Barnabas does find the Playroom, what good is that?"
"(David) What do you mean?"
"(Hallie) Well, won't Gerard just take control of his mind too?"
"(David) I don't think so. Barnabas is different somehow."
"(Hallie) How?"
"(David) I don't know, but somehow he's almost as spooky as Gerard is. That ought to count for something."
"(Hallie) True."
"(David) And besides, if Gerard could control Barnabas, I have a feeling he'd have done it already. I mean look who he's controlled so far. Just you, me, Carolyn and Quentin. I have a feeling he can only control weak minds."
"(Hallie) That sounds logic... Hey! I resent that!"


(In the Foyer)
"(Julia) Don't you see, Elizabeth? Carolyn's behavior proves that something very strange is going on here."
"(Liz) Julia, if Carolyn acting like a nutcase meant she was possessed, then she's been possessed since she was 12."
"(Barnabas) How is she?"
"(Julia) She seems calmer now."
"(Barnabas) That's good."
"(Liz) Ever since Julia jabbed her with a sedative the size of a canned ham."

"(Liz) I certainly hope you two will leave her alone after this."
"(Julia) Us? We certainly didn't ask her to sing."
"(Barnabas) Elizabeth, with your permission, I would like to take David and Hallie to Stokes tonight."
"(Liz) Absolutely not!"
"(Julia) Elizabeth, Hallie is Stokes' niece, and he's concerned about her safety too. If I ask him to, he can remove Hallie from here without your permission. Do you want to have to explain to David why I did?"
"(Liz) All right, but if I agree, how will I explain to David about both of them sent away?"
"(Barnabas) Tell him I tripped that bucket of water he left over the door!"

(David and Hallie steal into the Playroom)
"(David) We're not stealing!"
"(Hallie) Yeah, we came to deliver, not pick up!"

(David puts the Barnabas doll in Rose Cottage)
"(Hallie) I wonder if Gerard knows that we put the doll in Rose Cottage?"
"(David) He can't be everywhere at once! Don't worry."
"(Hallie) David! I just had another thought!"
"(David) Now what?"
"(Hallie) What if we get busted for making bootleg Dark Shadows merchandise?"
"(David) D'oh!"

"(David) Come on let's get out of here."
"(Hallie) I'm still scared."
(David takes Hallie by the hand)
"(Hallie) Do you think we have a chance?"
"(David) I don't know. All I know is that whether we live, or whether we die, one way or the other... this whole experience has been my first chance ever to touch a girl."

(Liz, Barnabas and Julia enter David's Room)
"(Liz) I don't know why I ever let you talk me into coming here."
"(Barnabas) We want you to see the children."
"(Liz) I've seen them, and they're perfectly all right."
"(Julia) We want you to see their bright, shining faces, and decide if you really want to endanger them."
"(Liz) Listen, Julia, maybe that description fits Hallie, but not the boy who spiked the punch at my last Bridge Club meeting, and had poor Mrs. Nussbaum up on the table singing I've Got a Luverly Bunch of Coconuts with a lampshade on her head."

(David and Hallie enter and find his room occupied)
"(David) What's going in here? A convention?"
"(Hallie) We should have saved some of that bootleg merchandise."
"(David) Shh!"

"(Liz) Where have you two been?"
"(David) Uh... In Hallie's Room."
"(Hallie) David wanted to crib my history notes."
"(David) Thanks, Hallie."
(Barnabas gets an odd look)
"(Julia) What's wrong?"
"(Barnabas) I just had the oddest feeling! Like somebody was walking on my grave... and it was ME!"
"(Julia) Only you would know what that feels like, Barnabas."

"(Julia) It suddenly feels cold in here to me too."
"(David) What are you two talking about?"
"(Hallie) It's not cold in here."
"(Barnabas) There's a presence in here. Elizabeth, you feel it, don't you?"
"(Liz) Erm... If it will get you out of here, I do."
"(Barnabas) The two of you better go to Hallie's room."
"(David) What for?"
"(Barnabas) Er, study David's History Notes again."
"(Julia) Otherwise, the two of you are liable to BE history."

(Hallie and David leave)
"(Barnabas) All right, Elizabeth. Maybe you were skeptical before, but you can't deny that this cold exists."
"(Liz) Er...I suppose not."
"(Barnabas) Now, I want your permission to take the children away from here tonight.!"
"(Liz) Er... Well... All right."
"(Barnabas) Thank you."
(Barnabas and Julia leave but not before Julia closes an open window)


(Hallie and David return to the Playroom)
"(Hallie) We already put the doll in the house. What are we doing back here now?"
"(David) Borrowing trouble."
"(Hallie) David, LOOK!"
"(David) (covering his ears) Oh no, not THAT again!"

(The Barnabas Doll is on the Playroom floor, smashed to pieces)
"(Hallie) Gerard didn't want Barnabas coming here!"
"(Hallie) He doesn't want him to know!"
"(Hallie) Well, don't just stand there! Say something!"
"(David) Well, back to the old drawing board."

(Downstairs, Julia hangs up the phone in disgust)
"(Julia) Of course, how silly of me. Eliot isn't there. He's lecturing tonight."
"(Liz) Another college class?"
"(Julia) No, he's giving that paperboy a piece of his mind."

(Back in David's Room)
"(Hallie) Gerard is angry with us."
"(David) Go to your room and stay there no matter what."
"(Hallie) You're not my mother!"
"(David) For your own safety! I'm going to try something and I don't want you to get hurt."
"(Hallie) Sigh! David, you're so good to me. Do you think... Do you think if we manage to get out of this that this might end with us getting married?"
"(David) Gosh no, I was hoping for a happy ending."
"(Hallie) D'oh! I should have known to ask before you were 16."


"(Barnabas) It's settled. I'll go get the children and drive them over to Stokes' in the Vampire Van."
"(Liz) Barnabas. Don't alarm them."
"(Barnabas) Of course not."
"(Liz) I'd tell them myself, but I don't know what to say."
"(Julia) I told Hallie I was going to take her to the Beauty Parlor with me."
"(Liz) YOU go to the Beauty Parlor??"
"(Julia) D'oh! That's just what Hallie said!"

(After Barnabas and Julia leave, Liz closes herself in the Drawing Room)
"(Liz) Gerard? Gerard, are you here? I didn't know what to do, Gerard! Their Clues I can poo-poo, but that chill in the air was undeniable!"

(Barnabas enters David's Room, but finds it empty)
"(Barnabas) David? David, are you here?"
(Barnabas trips another hidden bucket of water)

(David sneaks down the stairs, and out of the house, stopping only long enough to deliver a public service message)
"(David) Don't do drugs!"


(David leaves the house in a trance)
"(David) (glassy eyed) Yes. Yes. Must leave house. Must go to malt shoppe. Stay up way past bedtime. (As long as I'm possessed, no reason not to milk this a bit)."


"(Barnabas) Hmph! "Also" Starring! Why can't she be "Also Starring" once in a while??"

"(Carolyn) I thought you said you liked my singing, mother!"
"(Liz) Carolyn, saying that you sound like a nightingale flew down your throat and built a nest there is NOT a compliment!"


"(Hallie) "I must have a split personality," said Lela, being Frank."
"(David) "I've only got diamonds, clubs and spades," said Lela, heartlessly."
"(Liz) Will you two knock it off with the Lela Swifties??"

"(Tom Bodett) Dan Curtis Productions, we finally left the light on for ya."

          Episode 1095:   Realizing the immediate danger, Barnabas and Julia decide they must get David and Hallie out of Collinwood.